Saturday, 4 December 2010

FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND

I went into meltdown yesterday. Everything seemed to overwhelm me and I couldn't even seem to make the most elementary decisions. I just wanted to crawl into a hole. Let the world pass me by for a few weeks. Get Christmas over. Wake up in the Spring.

I could tell that everyone was so concerned and absolutely paralised with fear and helplessness to know what to do for me. But there was nothing that could be done. It's a lonely place to be and they couldn't climb in with me.

Then my friend and colleague Tanya sent me this. It's so beautiful. With this she managed to reach into my heart to help be back out into the world again. I do have faith in a God and I must hand my will and my life over to him again. Thank you Tanya, you are a true, dear friend.

20 comments:

slommler said...

I always think of the story of Joseph and how his brothers threw him into a well. God reached in a pulled him out and blessed him beyond measure. And not only him; but the whole country!!
That's God for you!!! When you are in that deep well...He is the ONLY one that can pull you out...but you have to let Him!
Hugging you dearest friend
SueAnn

Valleys Mam said...

Sometimes we need to be a little lost to reasie how much we love to be alive

Alcoholic Daze (ADDY) said...

I've got the CD and play that song often. It so helps. So sorry you were having a bad day. It's coming up to your first anniversary too, which won't help. Hope today is better. One day at a time.

Eva Gallant said...

Beautiful!

Retiredandcrazy said...

I should remember that when I spin out SueAnn, but some days are so shitty. What set me off yesterday was a series of set backs starting with my accountant making a mistake on my tax return that I've been trying to rectify and ending with the photo copier breaking down. Silly.

I needed to break down really because I've been too calm about Davy's death last Christmas and other traumatic family problems. I suspect that I may have a few more crap days before the Christmas holiday is over.

I have heard that the 1st anniversary is the worse, but quite honestly I can't imagine it getting any better.

Retiredandcrazy said...

And I do love to be alive VM, I just sometimes forget!

Retiredandcrazy said...

Thank God for "one day at a time" Addy.

Retiredandcrazy said...

Yes, it truly is beautiful isn't it Eva?

Maggie May said...

Thank you for sharing. That was really inspiring and a great reminder that we aren't alone.
This Christmas is so full of reminders for me too as so much was happening for me last year at this time.
Memories can evoke such strong feelings.
We must press onwards......... not always easy.
Maggie X

Nuts in May

laurie said...

for all that, there's something to be said for it suddenly being spring.....

aims said...

There will always be these down times. It happens to everyone - most just don't admit it.

Valleys Mam said it very well.

We look back and wonder why we felt that way, yet when it returns we know exactly why.

Tomorrow, tomorrow, the sun will come out, tomorrow.

Hold on. It does get better.

lisaschaos said...

I think we all have moments of meltdown. I'm so glad that something came across your path to lift your spirits. :0)

Eliza said...

It's a beautiful cd, I play it a lot. I hope you feel better soon ((((hugs)))))

Grit said...

i'd like to send you this wonderful, irreverent/reverent video that's doing the rounds in our part of the world... almost worth putting on the lipgloss and sitting in the shopping mall, hoping for the celestial junk food choir to turn up xx

http://tinyurl.com/2cye9s9

Retiredandcrazy said...

It's been a tough year hasn't it Maggie?

Retiredandcrazy said...

You have a very valid point there Laurie!

Retiredandcrazy said...

It's better already aims. My trouble is letting go and when I do it all happens at once! But that's over for a few weeks (hopefully).

Retiredandcrazy said...

Something always does happen to change things lisa, the trick is to keep an open mind and let these things in instead of dwelling on the bad stuff all the time.

Retiredandcrazy said...

Grit, I love you. That is so uplifting. That's two things that have lightened my modd. Thanks.

Retiredandcrazy said...

PS of course it was my mood that was lightened, not my modd. Naughty fingers!