Friday, 12 November 2010

LIONS & TIGERS VERSUS RABBITS

Years ago I was told by a very wise lady that it's not the lions and tigers that get you, it's the rabbits that'll kick you to death.

Since Davy died last Christmas my rabbits are things like having to deal with light bulbs that fuse solidly and can't be removed, light sockets that refuse to grip a replacement bulb, light bulbs that need replacing but are too incomprehensable to understand, short-outs that cause electric clocks, boiler timers and security alarms to need resetting. Grrrr.

I had anticipated the lions and tigers, but I can testify that this lady's words were absolutely correct, the rabbits are the real baddies.

On Sunday I read an interview with Neil Diamond in which he said that he was looking for someone to settle down with. Well I'm here Neil, ready, willing and able, but with one proviso, you must have a good DIY skills with a particular emphasis in the electrical department.

19 comments:

slommler said...

Ha! Rabbits will definitely get you!
Hugs
SueAnn

Alcoholic Daze (ADDY) said...

I know exactly what you mean. I too have been grappling with fused-in light bulbs and had to call an electrician out to my mother's to change a lightbulb, as it would not budge. Have also been having a lot of smoke alarms giving up on me too. Makes you wonder if the dearest departed are playing tricks.

Maggie May said...

As I watch my two little rabbits snuggling into each other, I can't believe you are writing this!!!!! Don't you mean rats?
They are the niggling things that take away your peace of mind & chew up your peace!
I do know what you mean though. It is the little things that get to you. The straw that breaks the camels back.
Maggie X

Nuts in May

Eva Gallant said...

Good Lucl with Neil. Where the hell was he when I was ready to settle down 30 years ago?

TechnoBabe said...

Neil Diamond? Really? Did you send your application?

Mimi said...

Aww, sorry that you're having a tough time. I think it owuld be computers in my case- if anything goes wrong, I never know where to start, unless you start by kicking it!
Neil crooning in your ear would certainly help.

Retiredandcrazy said...

I know that from painful experience SueAnn.

Retiredandcrazy said...

I often wonder that Addy. It seems to be a common experience.

Retiredandcrazy said...

Just reporting a quote Maggie. I guess the sentiment is that rabbits look so cuddly, but they have an unpredictable and unexpected mean side too!

Retiredandcrazy said...

PS Maggie, but I do remember you problems with the rats too!

Retiredandcrazy said...

You may have been ready to settle down 30 years ago Eva, but the question is, was he?

Retiredandcrazy said...

This is my application TB. Do you think that he will be attracted to me?

WHEN I AM AN OLD WOMAN I SHALL WEAR PURPLE
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Taken from the book

Retiredandcrazy said...

Computers is the one thing that I DO have help with Mimi, but you are right, they are so infuriating aren't they?

What am I saying? Neil I'm a helpless lady that needs a lot of TLC.

Strawberry Jam Anne said...

It is the little things that get you in the end - like the last straw! Now with Neil Diamond around you could just relax and let him sing to you. He won't be able to resist your application. Worth a try for sure - don't forget it only took a letter to get Johnny Depp to visit a school recently.

Nick said...

Good luck, but somehow I can't see Neil Diamond changing light bulbs on a Hot August Night, or even a Cold November Day

Jay at The Depp Effect said...

Ah, but it's good to see you haven't lost your sense of humour!

Rabbits, yes. They're little devils, they are, and yes, they will get you. Lions and tigers, those you can see coming, but the rabbits .. there are so many of the little beggars!

Good luck with Neil! ;)

Retiredandcrazy said...

I had forgotten about Johnny Depp thing Anne. Now there is a hero. Maybe he would be interested in my application!?

Retiredandcrazy said...

I wouldn't be so crass as to ask Neil to change light bulbs Nick. He would be far too busy adoring me to sully his hands with such a mundane task! Thanks for the visit.

Retiredandcrazy said...

As you can see Jay, you also have a rival for Johnny. He is my "Plan B".